Who Should Be In PlayStation All-Stars Battle Royale?
Friday, June 29, 2012
James in Features, Kaz Hirai, Kevin Butler, Playstation Battle Royale, Sony

    

We here at Press Pause Radio are super excited to see another company with a diverse backlog of characters take a stab at the Smash Brothers formula, and with Sony's almost twenty year history in gaming the catalogue is rich and wonderful. So we asked ourselves, what classic characters that have premiered on a Sony system we would like to see. And this is what we came up with...


 

Polygon Man

If Sony wants to see any real success with this game, they’re going to have to get wackier than shit with the PlayStation brand and pull out the most obscurest of obscure in their trademark’s repertoire. So where can I possibly start from? How about Sony’s ridiculous first attempt at market identity? Yeah, I’m taking about Polygon Man, the spiky haired freak who stated how the PlayStation was supposedly more powerful than God. What better character to emulate the end game conflict that PlayStation All Stars liberally steals from, than some giant floating fucking head threatening to beat you like a Piñata?

 Sora

The star of the unlikely Square and Disney crossover would be a great choice to bring in. He’s combat ready with his Keyblade, and would have the ability -- with Disney’s permission of course -- to summon in popular Disney characters to assist in combat. It would be awesome to end a combo by dropping Dumbo on top of another character, or to have Simba stun all characters on screen with a massive roar. Licensing issues would be a hassle, but it would be a good idea for Sony to show it still remembers the Kingdom Hearts property exists.

 Spyro

One of the original PlayStation heroes, Spyro brought many kids to the PlayStation back in the 90s. While he’s picked up a cadre of tag-a-longs lately, we should bring him back to spit some fire on the newbies. Being a dragon, he would be able to fly, or at least glide around stage. He probably wouldn’t be too great up close, but his ranged fire attacks would keep other combatants on their toes. Let him summon some of his big bad dragon friends as well to help toast some motherfuckers. Go crazy with him; he hasn’t headlined in years.

 Robbit

We're going old school with this one. Robbit, the titular hero from one of Sony’s earliest series, Jumping Flash, has been seemingly forgotten, as he hasn't really appeared since his original PlayStation days. Bring him back in style, and give him powerful kicks that can launch opponents across the screen. He should be able to jump all the way to the top of the stage. And just because, give him some missiles for a ranged option. I think this rabbit is jumping at the bit for a comeback. Ha, rabbit puns.

 Crash Bandicoot

 

He hasn’t exactly been faithful to Sony as of late, but why not give this old mascot a second chance? His games helped the popularity of the old console explode, and he was so popular enough to challenge Mario to a fight with a bullhorn. Bring him back with a vengeance, and give him spin attacks and quick punches to take down the opposition. Let him gain the super ability to put on the voodoo mask and go buck wild. Stay true to the character's wild and wacky roots, and this could be the start of a great return of the character to Sony’s console.

Neo Cortex

If we’re going to bring back the bandicoot, his arch nemesis Neo Cortex would also be an awesome addition. And with his gadgets and minions, he would be completely unpredictable. Hell, let him throw a mind control cap on some unsuspecting combatant, and allow him to take control away from opposing characters. He could be the most annoying character in the game, but fuck it -- he's an evil villain mad scientist. Do you want him to be cordial and bring you tea and cake? This game needs more maniacal evil anyway.

Lara Croft

The first polygon gaming bombshell would be a perfect inclusion into the game. Use her new model from the Tomb Raider reboot to keep things consistent, and you got a fan favorite in the making. With her reboot coming along soon, what better way to keep her in the minds of gamers? Keep her agile and quick, and give her tons of guns and grenades to make her a great ranged character. Let her call in some tigers and raptors as her ultimate ability, and just for shits and giggles, give her alternate outfits featuring her old character models.

Mega Man

So Mega Man isn’t exactly a character specific to Sony, but neither is Big Daddy. Wouldn’t it be great to have him in when he was so obviously snubbed from Marvel vs. Capcom 3? Mega Man had a nice run on both the original PlayStation and PS2, and adding him to the roster would be excellent. Change his power set by picking up items that Rush drops, making him a variable ranged character who's unpredictable. Since Capcom is doing everything in its power to pretend he doesn’t exist lately, throw the fans a bone here.

Emmett Graves

This seems to be a likely prediction, seeing how Starhawk was just recently released, and the game’s protagonist is still new to many Sony fans. Emmett is a gun for hire which players are able to control in the single player campaign of Starhawk, as he protects civilians mining Rift Energy from attacks from the Outcasts. The rift energy flowing through Emmett’s veins could be very beneficial in a combat situation, as well as his expertise when it comes to weaponry both on ground and in the air. The stage that would come along with his appearance would be very interesting to see as well, potentially showcasing a battle between Rifters and Outcasts. Bases and turrets could be incorporated into the battle as well.

Alicia Melchiott

 

 This would be a long shot, but I believe the upcoming brawler should have some more lesser known Sony exclusive titles included, such as Valkyria Chronicles. Alicia Melchiott, the hopeful baker turned Sergeant is, in my opinion, the most memorable character from Squad 7. Her expertise in war would be ideal for this battle royale, and she would be a welcomed addition to a roster which, so far, has only one female combatant (Fat Princess). I would be excited to see the possibilities in her attacks -- perhaps a Level 3 super move that would see the Edelweiss charging across the screen taking out multiple opponents, while the rest of Squad 7 hang on and offer their support.

Guitarro Man

Most of you probably don’t know who Guitarro Man is. To put it simply, he is a boy who fights evil with the power of a space guitar and rhythm games. Guitarroo Man only had one game, and a rerelease on PSP, but it was enough for him to win a place in some of our hearts. He could blast characters off the stage with sound waves, and his ultimate would bring up a competitive rhythm game to see who gets caused damage. He's one cool character who was never used enough, and didn’t get the respect he deserves.

Aegis

Aegis is the titular robot from Persona 3. What better character to represent one of Sony’s most popular RPG series of the past decade than a robot with fucking machine gun arms? She could be a powerhouse at both melee and ranged, but she would be slow. For her ultimate, have her summon a couple of persona’s you could control, kind of like the Pokémon trainer from Smash Bros., and wreak total havoc by freezing your enemies with Jack Frost, or electrocuting them with Inugami. I know Persona is getting lots of fan love here recently, so show us you understand what's going on in the gaming world.

Ratchet and Clank

This one is probably already a given, but just not announced yet. Ratchet and Clank was my personal favorite series from the PS2 days, and one of Sony’s out in-front platforming heavyweights. With all the crazy weapons at Ratchet’s disposal, the possibilities for this character are endless -- turn your enemies into chickens, pick them up with the tornado gun, or just decimate them with the Rhino. For their ultimate, have Clank turn into his giant robot form and Stomp around the stage, destroying platforms and everything. The PS2 duo are a definite must-have selection in Battle Royale.

Tomba

Finally, if you’ve read George’s review, than you’ll know he has a soft spot for the pink-haired wonder, and he may be the most natural fit on this list. Between his trademark jump ‘n grapple attack to his suits and weapons, this guys is practically the “Ness” of the Sony brand, and brings joy to anyone who recognizes him. Hopefully he'll get the chance to do the same for players who have yet to experience the pink hairdo. Tomba was wildly popular back in the day, and if any character deserves a look for future franchises, this pig-beating caveman deserves it like no other.


 

Just For Funsies

Kaz Hirai

Sony is able boast the debut of what was once one of most impressive racing games of its time, Ridge Racer. Before it was slowly reduced to the “Madden” of racing games, one man always worked laboriously to make you care about it more than anything: Kaz Hirai. Sure, the obvious choice is going to be Kevin Butler on most of these lists, but why not throw in the preverbal king of Sony himself? At least as a fightable opponent, just because he might be too stone cold to pilot as a playable character.

Kevin Butler

While there are rumors going around that he is a shoe-in for the game, I'm going to throw my support in for a playable Kevin Butler. He’s an obvious choice because he’s fucking suave and awesome. Just like the goofy Mr. Game and Watch, have him be a secret character. Better yet, he could be a boss character with a bullhorn spouting Sony PR and witty banter to confuse the opposition. When he melees, have him use Sony’s peripherals like the Move (could turn into a sword), or have him summon an Eye Pet to do his bidding. He could at least be a fun griefing character, and everyone would love the addition.

The Irritating Stick

He’s a stick, and he’s irritating... what more do you need to know?



Have any PlayStation favorites you'd like to see in Battle Royale? Tell us in the comment section below, or continue the discussion by posting in our forums.

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